What Thoughts Really Are

As per the meditation log of June 2nd:

During these days of sitting meditation, while subduing the body and mind, I have employed methods such as contemplative recitation of the Buddha’s name, silent recitation of the Heart Sutra, silent chanting of the Buddha’s name, reciting the Shurangama Mantra, contemplating the thirty-two impure components of the body, and observing the arising, changing, and ceasing of dharma dust to focus the mind and alleviate restlessness and agitation.

It is like taming a wild horse; one needs to use various methods to understand what it likes, what it wants, why it likes it, identify the cause, and then resolve that cause before the desire and thoughts in that regard can cease.

Personally, I find that after settling into meditation, contemplatively observing the changing and ceasing of the thirty-two impure components of the body one by one is very effective. As soon as I begin with the mental intention: “Hair” from “hair, body hair, nails, teeth, skin”... the mind begins to quieten. After roughly contemplating the thirty-two components once, I then turn inward to observe what this mind that can perceive, observe, and discriminate is like, where it is, what it depends on and what it perceives, its scope of function, and its distinction from consciousness.

During contemplation, simply maintaining a single doubt: “Who am I?”, and then repeatedly experiencing and discerning within the physical body and consciousness the state, characteristics, scope of function, conditions, distinctions, etc., of each phenomenon one by one, suddenly, at some unknown moment, it aligns with the Dharma principles I have learned. I then realize that the understanding gained from study is different from the feeling after experiential contemplation, even though the conclusion is the same.

Sometimes, when stray thoughts suddenly arise, instead of suppressing them, my method is to contemplate the cause of the emergence of this dharma dust, to contemplate the essence, source, dependence, and perceived objects of the dharma dust. Later, I discovered that I had attached a label to all of them: self, others, him/her. Then, I judged them as right or wrong, true or false, good or bad, and subsequently, emotions like joy and anger, agitation, depression and dissatisfaction, anxiety and craving—these unrelinquishable emotions—arose, obscuring, suppressing, binding, and shackling the originally pure mind like dust, truly weaving our own cocoon. Originally, these are merely dharma dust left by past memories; they are not the mind, yet do not exist apart from the mind, inherently lacking self-nature—they are merely conceptual memories within our own mind-field. Having resolved the dharma dust, I then came to understand the essence, source, dependence, and perceived objects of the five sense objects: form, sound, smell, taste, and touch.

This is the cause for the arising of stray thoughts. In the beginning, one must repeatedly recognize and discern the dharma dust before being able to relinquish the mental grasping. Only after relinquishing does one feel relieved and inwardly composed. The method of suppression cannot solve the root problem; it’s like knowing that it is so but not knowing why it is so, making stray thoughts difficult to subdue.

Furthermore, contemplation must be preceded by mature hearing and contemplation (study and reflection); otherwise, wisdom cannot arise, one won’t know how to contemplate and discern, resulting in calm (samatha) without contemplative wisdom (vipassanā). For example, every doctor has a certain degree of direct observation of the body’s birth, change, aging, and death, yet the notion that “the body is mine” remains unchanged—lacking wisdom and unaware of the need to investigate the essence of life. Therefore, I personally feel that mature hearing and contemplation before contemplation is the foundation.

Then, contemplate the mutual influence between the physical body and consciousness, and deeply believe that every arising thought bears karmic fruit, that it is all self-created and self-received. Then, the mind becomes increasingly tranquil and peaceful.

Finally, settle the mind on the breath at the nostrils. Sometimes, when the breath becomes very subtle, I only feel the entire physical body breathing, with no boundary between inside and outside the body. When concentration is good, I feel the body and mind are in a state of no-self and no-master, gradually losing the concept of the body. Currently, I can basically maintain the half-lotus position for an hour without changing legs. After getting up, I feel mentally refreshed. However, when the legs become numb, swollen, or painful, mental strength weakens, requiring a change of legs to continue.

After getting up and going out to move around, practicing Tai Chi, I feel it is the same as sitting meditation and contemplation—very quiet, very slow, very relaxed, entering the state of contemplation. The body and mind are in a state of no-self and no-master, breathing evenly, with no one present—only arms, only legs moving slowly through the air, only the calls of birds rising and falling in the emptiness, only the formless, shapeless, placeless mind aware, with no one present.

In daily life, I try to keep the mental attention on the thirty-two impure components of the physical body, not looking at the body as a whole, thus observing the impermanence and lack of inherent ownership of the physical body. Currently, I am still unable to maintain uninterrupted mental attention.

Comment: All thoughts, ideas, and notions arise from ignorance (avidyā), and ignorance has no source, no destination; it is an illusory dharma. Since stray thoughts, ideas, and notions arise from ignorance, which has no source, there is no need to take them as real. See through them, penetrate them, do not follow the rising and falling of wandering thoughts, remain unmoved like thusness (tathatā), and gradually these ignorant thoughts will disappear by themselves. The mind then becomes pure and peaceful. Then, contemplating the perceived object, it becomes clearly and brightly illuminated, and ignorance diminishes. Human thoughts and ideas come and go; try as one might to hold onto them, they cannot be retained, always changing incessantly, impossible to fix. See through them, ignore them, do not move with them, and the mind naturally becomes cool and clear.