When you do something wrong, is it enough to apologize in person or repent in your heart?

When you know you have done wrong and have done something that wronged another person, you should repent and apologize. Apologizing means sincerely expressing your remorse and guilt to the other person, so as to make up for their emotional hurt, dispel their displeasure, and at the same time resolve enmity and dissolve grudges, clearing away the lingering resentment in their heart and making the relationship harmonious. Repentance and apology should have a goal and an object, because if you have done something that wronged someone, you must openly acknowledge your fault to that person face to face, repent and apologize, in order to show your sincerity. This shows that you have truly recognized that you wronged the other person, that you want to correct your mistake, and that you wish to make amends to them.

If you do not apologize and repent to that person face to face, but only repent in your heart, not daring to face them, such repentance lacks sincerity. It cannot dispel the resentment in the other person's heart, cannot make up for their emotional hurt, and cannot change the relationship between the two of you. Since the other person has suffered harm and unfair treatment, and since you have recognized this, you should offer them some compensation—at the very least, compensation on the emotional and psychological level. Explain the matter clearly face to face so that they can let go of it in their heart; this is the most basic form of respect and repentance. You may have all kinds of feelings and emotions on your side, but the other person knows nothing of them. Since the manas of the two of you have not connected, the knot in the heart cannot be completely untied, and the estrangement cannot be completely removed. Such repentance is not thorough or ultimate; it carries a psychological tendency to evade the problem and not dare to face one's mistakes.