The Principles of Memory and Amnesia

Question: Twelve years ago, my brain suffered severe oxygen deprivation, resulting in functional damage and memory loss (this was the doctor's examination result). It was the memory related to people and events. The doctor said I might never remember again, and could only take some medication to slightly strengthen my memory so it would not affect my future life. For the entire twelve years after that, my memory was very poor. I could not remember people's faces, and often could not recall things that had just happened.

During the pandemic this year, I was alone in Wuhan. Those dozens of days were especially quiet. Suddenly one day, the people and events of the past flashed through my mind, scene after scene, extremely vivid. I immediately called my mother, and she asked me many questions and found that I had truly remembered. But my memories of these twelve years are very vague. I really want to know an answer: what exactly happened when I lost my memory and then recovered it? Also, regarding my personality—I have observed that after recovering my memory, I am more like my childhood self, with few distracting thoughts in my mind, good concentration, and good self-discipline. Even when I sleep very little, I am energetic all day, completely unlike myself during these twelve years, when my brain became very active. Master, I long to know an answer—I truly want to know what happened.

Answer: If the brain is deprived of oxygen, the qi and blood cannot circulate normally and cannot synthesize the nutritional elements in the blood, so the blood's nourishment is insufficient. When the blood supply is insufficient, the brain's function—the supreme faculty (indriya)—lacks the corresponding four great element seeds, causing damage to brain function. When brain function is damaged, it cannot normally receive the six sense objects, including mental sense objects (dharma-viṣaya) and subjectively imagined realms. When faculties and objects cannot normally make contact, the mind consciousness cannot arise to recall the past. This is the principle of amnesia.

And during the pandemic, with free time on hand, the manas had little external grasping and had nothing to occupy itself with, so the mind consciousness also had little grasping and few delusive thoughts. Both the mind consciousness and the manas had meditative concentration (samādhi). As the mind quieted down, the manas did not cling much to the body, the circulation of qi and blood became smooth, the supply of the four great elements was balanced, the brain was replenished with nourishment, and its function recovered. It then continued to normally receive mental sense objects and subjectively imagined realms, and subsequently the mind consciousness arose to discern the subjectively imagined realms, thus regaining the functional attribute of recollection.

But during the twelve years of illness, the brain's supreme faculty (indriya) was damaged, and the discernment of the mind consciousness was weak and blurry. No seeds of clear discernment were stored in the tathāgatagarbha. After recovery, there were no longer any subjectively imagined realm mental objects in the tathāgatagarbha capable of manifesting as current activity; therefore, the mind consciousness's recollection of these twelve years is rather vague.

During these twelve years, the mind consciousness was weak, so it lacked the strength to perfume, influence, and control the manas, and the manas manifested its own inherent personality attributes. Twelve years ago, the mind consciousness was strong and could effectively control and perfume the manas, so the mind consciousness's character, temperament, and disposition were dominant. Now that the mind consciousness has recovered its memory and its function is strong again, it will continue the character, temperament, and disposition of twelve years ago.